A few months ago I felt my first taste of death...my baby 11 weeks in my womb. As I miscarried my child I was at a loss of how could this be? How could the Most High take this child I so desperately wanted after years of trying to conceive?!?
The answers I got through my anguish and prayers are deep...are you ready?
I am unsure where to start on this one. It truly is deep and only a revelation I just recently gotten. And honestly I am unsure there are any words to convey my understanding on this, it just is...
With that I will attempt to begin.
Before my baby was miscarried I held death as something that just happens. I used to be very fearful of death but I decided if I had to I would give my life for Yeshua if need be...but did I truly feel that way. At that time I thought so but now I am not so sure. When I miscarried, death seemed so dark and empty. It wasn't until then I didn't understand death much more than an atheist.
One main fact I learned is that how you view death is how you view or trust Yeshua and what HE did for HIS followers.
Do we understand what transpired at the cross?
Are we as believers really willing to lay down our life, or this just all talk?
Death seemed so wrong and unnatural but it is the ONLY sure thing in our human lives. None of us will escape this life and our fate will eventually be a physical death. Death is our surety. So WHY are most fearful of it when it is our is the only sure outcome? Why are we so opt to save our lives even in the harm of another? (And yes, humans throughout history have proven in a time of crisis many will turn on others for survival.)
It is the fear of the unknown. We are so attached to the physical that we cannot think outside of that reality unless we have a close relationship to our Savior and wholeheartedly understand what happened at the cross over 2000 years ago!
Let me ask you a question? What does it mean when Yeshua conquered death? Does that mean we will not physically die? No! We all know it means HE gives us life...but do you really believe that? Do you truly understand that you will not taste death if you are a true follower of HIS.
And let me explain what a true follower is...a true follower of Yeshua follows HIS commands that was laid out in the first five books of the bible called the Torah (instructions). They were not done away with but lay out the instruction of what it means to follow HIM. I am not going to go there today but please pray about this if you do not believe. ALL of HIS commandments still apply until the earth is no longer and when I look out my window the earth is still there.
Anyway, I got to a point to where I was questioning my purpose and who Yeshua really is and why HE allows death especially with a baby who has yet to taste sin. After weeks of heartbreak it all finally makes sense.
What Yeshua did on the cross more than being the sacrificial lamb for our sins, but HE also paved the way to immortality. We were once the walking dead and when HE redeemed us through the Holy Spirit we also earned eternity with HIM. Do you understand what this means??? Apart from HIM is death, but in HIM alone is life. Meaning, since you will die a physical death your fate was to seize to exist. However, if you accept HIS offer and follow HIM, Yeshua was the final sacrificial lamb that was necessary for forgiveness of our sins and allowed you to be pardoned on judgement day and live a life of abundance.
And let's chat about abundance. I have read books about abundance and mindset and have found them to be purely pagan works. When one has Yeshua, then they have all that is needed. Seriously, why want all of the abundance of this world when you have the abundance and surety of eternal life with our Savior? No comparison!
When I was in the midst of my miscarriage I was thinking about all of the promises of the Most High. I was doing my best and believed that living under grace meant I would never suffer the heart aches of those who didn't have the promises of our Savior. After all I was following HIS commandments to my best ability!
Oh how far from the truth that is!!!!!! The life of a believer does indeed include suffering and for the good! For instance, John the Baptist was the guy who baptized Yeshua, and while Yeshua walked this earth John the Baptist was put into prison and eventually beheaded. Like come on, seriously, why didn't Yeshua save John? It wasn't as though both of their mothers were pregnant together. Or an angel literally came to John's dad and told him that John would be born after his wife struggled with infertility. So we can definitely conclude John had a special mission, but in the end John suffered a horrific death making him a martyr while Yeshua was here in his physical life.
When I think about the death of John the Baptist, I wonder why Yeshua just didn't stop the situation? After all, Yeshua was casting out demons and healing everyone who believed. Wow.
John the Baptist's situation has weighed heavy on me. If Yeshua wasn't going to save the life of John they why would HE just save everyone from death? OHHHHH, because HE did! Because our life isn't defined by anything physical, including our physical bodies. We are defined by how HE sees us and that is something much much more deep than our physical experience.
Thus, I have concluded that our physical death means nothing. Actually, even more, our sufferings are just temporary situations that have no bearing on our ensured outcome. Suffering is just merely a means of refining the life of believer to trust the Father who we give our life to and promised life after this physical experience. Death and suffering are purely a physical experience we are blessed with but what our hope really is in is the life we gain because of what Yeshua did at the cross...and that is all that really matters.
My challenge is to see death as a blessing. There is a beauty in death for the true follower of Yeshua. Death of this physical means that our sufferings are over and our sure abundance is coming as promised by our Most High. And the most important fact, we get HIM!
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